I am a wife, a mother, an auntie and a friend. I love thrifting, garage sales, re-purposing, creating, painting, anything that makes our little rental home more welcoming, comfortable and cozy. I have discovered the "art" of amateur photography & I love the idea of capturing the beauty in the ordinary everyday things that surround us. Blogging is a wonderful way to make new friends and share with people who have the same interests. My personal taste in decorating leans towards "casual cottage/coastal decor". I now have a small shop on etsy, called "SandySeashore" where you'll find some of my vintage finds, my photography and some handmade things. I hope you take the time to check it out! Thanks for droppin' in!

Thursday, May 24, 2012

I'm back...did ya miss me? LOL

Hi There! Wow! hard to believe I haven't posted for almost two months!

In all honesty, the reason for my not posting for a while is because of frustration and not wanting to be judged. My frustration lies with people that don't understand the invisible illness that is fibromyalgia. It is like so many other illnesses, it has no face, except to those who suffer with it, and believe me (and other "fibromyalgics") we do suffer. Daily. 

A few months ago, my doctor suggested I take a leave from work due to my illness, I was suffering immensely and was very depressed. I agreed reluctantly to take a short leave of two weeks rather than the longer extended leave she was suggesting for a few reasons:
  1.  was to not disrupt the office I work in
  2.   financial reasons
  3. I hoped it would be enough time for my body to rest and recharge itself.
My doctor suggested that while I was off I should get as much sleep as possible, try to walk every day (because it is an activity I enjoy), is spite of my pain. She also suggested I do things to elevate my mood, as much as possible like hobbies, one I am still able to do, in short increments is painting.
This one took me weeks to complete. 

In honor of my cat "Topsy" who passed away this year.
 So, while I was off, on two separate occasions, I went to the beach, for a walk. Now if you know my blog, you know my favorite place in the world to be is the beach. Mexico especially, but any beach will do. Like a true Pisces, nothing raises my spirits like being by the water with my feet in the sand! On those two outings, I took my camera, and later posted the pictures on my blog.

 My actions were seen as something totally different than they were. I was judged. It was very hurtful, especially since it came from someone I considered a friend. It made me realize how little people know about this syndrome, and how little this person obviously knows me. It has been a struggle for six years  now, with so many different ailments and symptoms, wanting to know what is going on with my body and my mind,  not finding the reason for my pain, until last fall. 

I was finally given a diagnosis:  Fibromyalgia Syndrome.

 No one knows the exact cause of it, and it has no cure. It can be treated with medication, which helps some people, but not others.  Every one's pain is different, similar in some ways, different in others. It affects many facets of one's life.

After the two weeks off, I went back to work in spite of the awful pain I was in. The first day I was close to tears all day. By the end of the day, I was in excruciating pain, I could hardly keep my arms up to drive myself home. I cried all the way. I went home and took medication and went straight to bed. 

I knew then that my doctor was right. I needed to take a more extended leave and address this thing properly. I needed to try to get more restorative sleep, increase my medication, rest, relax, get some mild exercise and try to heal my body and my mind. The depression that comes with chronic pain is heavy and extremely draining. 

The next morning I had a discussion with one of my employers, who was very understanding. Then, I saw my doctor who just kinda smirked when I told her she was right. She's a wonderful doctor, I appreciate her intelligence,  understanding and care.

I have been off work since late March. I have brain-fog, memory loss, I constantly search for words, I cannot concentrate for very long, have to read and re-read the same thing to absorb it. I hurt all the time. I wake up hurting and go to bed hurting more. I am forever tired. Absolutely exhausted after doing household chores like folding laundry and doing dishes. I take naps daily and am still tired when I wake up. I am sad, I miss working, woodworking, gardening and taking long walks. I miss being strong. My irritable bowel is mad, not just irritable. My vision is blurry. I suffer with migraines...and the list goes on. Some days are better than others. I am thankful for the better ones, and looking forward to some good ones.

I am not complaining, I am trying to help people understand, in hopes that they will be more compassionate and less judgmental, and that comes with a better understanding of the syndrome and it's symptoms.  I am sorry this for rambling on so long, but again, if it helps at least one "fibromyalgic" be better understood and not judged, it's worth both my time and yours!

Please read my previous post on Fibromyalgia for more information. Thank you. 
My next post will be on Mexico!



  1. I love you sweetie!!!

  2. Hi Sandra...sorry to hear that you haven't been at your best. My cousin's wife also has fibromyalgia and your story sounds familiar. She bought some magnetic items, ie. bed pad, comforter etc through a company and seemed to have great results. I am searching for the name of it and will get back to you. I did however, find this article from a popular health store magazine here in Canada and they always have great articles..here is a link to one that you might want to read...not sure if you're into the 'health food' end of it or not, but might be something to consider...your regular Dr. may not have any clue about how the products will help you, but maybe a local health food store can point you in the right direction.
    I'll comment again as soon as I find the company name for you...